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Dear Harriet, Age 5

Posted by Carolyn on August 21, 2018 15 Comments

Dear, sweet Harriet,

And today you are five. How did that happen? You’re five, and you’ll be starting kindergarten in a couple weeks. My girl, I will miss you while you’re at school. We’ve been a team for the past few years, first while you were waiting to go to preschool, and last year as you were waiting to go to elementary school.  Now it’s your turn, and I’ll be on my own. While I’ll enjoy the time to myself, don’t get me wrong, I’ll also miss our time of just the two of us.

This morning, before people were up, I sneaked into your room to see if you were awake. You were, and I got to be the first person to wish you a happy birthday. You said you were just waiting in bed because nobody else was awake yet. We talked about what it was like 5 years ago today, with the two of us working together to look into each other’s eyes. That was a special day, and I’ll tell you about it every year until you understand it.

This year has been a big, fun one for you. You have learned so much, and worked so hard, especially on your speech. I’ve been going with you to your speech lessons this summer, and I’ve been impressed with your grit. You try and try and try. Sometimes you get it, sometimes you don’t, but I haven’t seen you give up. You are still creative and imaginative. You come up with the coolest things – like Paperland, and all the other lands that you can travel between. You still love your ooh-aahs and bears – sometimes you forget them at home, but luckily they can always find their way to you. You have real magic – you can see through things, and you’re really a wicked witch (but I wasn’t supposed to hear you tell Alma that one). You like mermaids, unicorns, and all things magical. You also like poop, toots, shake booty, and all things potty talk.

I hope that you stay just as curious and creative as you are now (or grow even more curious and creative!).  I hope you make great new friends who will last your whole life. I hope you learn new things – like how to read – and that you find joy in them. I hope you still want to cuddle and sleep on my lap. I hope that you are brave. I hope that you are strong. I hope that you resist what you know is wrong. I hope that you fight for what is right. I hope that you feel loved, greatly, every single day that you’re five.

Because you are loved greatly.

I love you, my sweet Hattie Girl.

All my love,
Mommy

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Posted in: created., letters for my daughters, writing | Tagged: birthday letter, dear harriet

Dear Alma, Age 6

Posted by Carolyn on January 3, 2018 1 Comment

Dearest Alma,

Five was a fun one.  Probably my favorite.  I loved how you were so curious and eager to learn all you could.  I loved seeing your confidence grow.

These past few months have been a little hard.  You didn’t have the easiest transition to kindergarten. I think it was hard for you to go from a play-based-three-hour-a-day-three-days-a-week preschool to full-on full day kindergarten. Adding the Spanish made for some long days of listening and working hard, just to understand.  But, these past few months have also shown us that you have some grit!  You haven’t given up, and you are actually, honest-to-God learning Spanish.  You amaze me when you hear Spanish and actually understand it – or when you come up with a word and use it the right way.  You are constantly correcting my accent, and I couldn’t be happier.  Your brain is a little sponge, and you’re soaking it all up.

You also recently lost your first teeth.  On Christmas Eve, late at night, when you should have been sleeping, you had Daddy pull your first tooth.  It kind of freaked you out to see the blood, but on Christmas, you were ready to have Dad pull the second one.  Your adult teeth had already grown in, so you didn’t have a gap-tooth smile.

Six will also be fun.  We have some fun things planned for you, my girl.  Six will be the year you learn so many new things – you’re taking piano lessons, you’ll probably start reading, you’ll learn more Spanish, you’ll get even better at swimming and diving.  Six will be the year that Harriet joins you at your school (I’m looking forward to that one!).  Six will be a year of trips and adventures.  I can’t wait to see what six will bring to you.

I love you, sweet bug.  You’re my girl, and you always will be.

All my love,
Mommy

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Posted in: letters for my daughters, writing | Tagged: birthday letter, dear alma

Autumn To Do, 2017

Posted by Carolyn on September 21, 2017 3 Comments

Today is the first day of Autumn.  Finally.  I love this time of year, when the light is fading, shadows get longer, our leaves do their lovely swan-song-and-dance.  It’s a time for fresh starts, nostalgia, dreaming, and turning inside – literally and metaphorically.

I’ve hinted at this a bit on the blog, but this summer was really hard, starting in the last couple weeks of school last year.  Some really difficult and confusing things happened at the girls’ school, and I was dragged into it despite all my efforts to remain on the outside.  I was betrayed by someone who I had previously trusted with my most important things.  This person spread rumors of the worst kind about me, and was acting irrationally and incredibly unprofessionally. She not only betrayed me, but she also completely wrote my daughters out of her life, which, honestly was much harder to deal with.  I spent the whole summer thinking about how to – and whether or not to – process it all on my blog.  Although we’re doing everything we can to move on from the situation, it’s still on my mind, and still makes me angry and sad whenever I think about it.  I guess I’m writing all of this down right now in order to move on with a fresh start, into Autumn.  It’s hard because this person has played a big, fun role in some of our Autumn traditions, and I know I will feel her absence and her betrayal acutely during those things.

But, I’m all about fresh starts and moving on, so that’s what I’ll do now.

Here’s what I want to do this Autumn:

  1. Pumpkin Patch with the playgroup
  2. Pumpkin Patch with our friends
  3. Hayrides.  All of them.
  4. Eat so many apples
  5. Pumpkin brew fest
  6. Eat as many Thanksgiving dinners as I can finagle my way into
  7. Halloween costumes
  8. Diffuse all the Autumn scents
  9. Walk with friends
  10. Write some letters
  11. Listen to as much nostalgic and melancholy music as my soul can handle
  12. Decorate for Christmas far too early
  13. #30daysofgratitude and #30daysofgratitudeATT
  14. Resist
  15. Plan Advent activities
  16. Anniversary date
  17. Go trick or treating
  18. Work on our quilt
  19. Put the garden to bed
  20. Weed
  21. Brew beer
  22. Go to a wedding
  23. Show love
  24. Spread happiness
  25. Do good

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Posted in: to do lists | Tagged: autumn, reflections, to do, to do list

Summer 2017 To-Do List Wrap-Up

Posted by Carolyn on September 20, 2017 Leave a Comment

We did pretty well this summer!  I did better getting the Girl Tribe and Family Fun lists done than my own.  There are some things we missed that surprise me – we never made ice cream?!  That darn ice cream truck never came by our house.  Another summer passed without making any tie dye. (We did actually hike, I just missed it when I was crossing things off).

We did a really good job with our daily schedule until our trips started in August, then everything got lost in the shuffle.  Same with reading a new book everyday.

Other things, I realized, weren’t that great in the summer.  Why go to the museums when it was so pretty outside? Other things were probably never going to happen – a family bath?  That was Alma’s brilliant and silly idea.

Looking at the list of things I wanted to do for me, it’s pretty clear I just didn’t take much time for myself during the summer.  And that’s okay, because I really did have a great time with my little girl tribe, and Jesse too, when he wasn’t working.

Happy last day of summer!

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Posted in: to do lists | Tagged: summer, to do, to do lists

Dear Harriet, Age Four

Posted by Carolyn on August 21, 2017 Leave a Comment

Dear Harriet,

I love this blurry photo of us for a few reasons.  First, I’m in it with you and I think it’s important that I get in the shot too, sometimes.  Second, just look at your sweet smile.  We were camping here, and girl, do you love camping.  You love exploring and running and playing and sleeping and swimming and building and s’mores.

This past year has been a doozy.  You definitely followed the trend of three-year-olds being difficult and stubborn.  You showed your opinion quite clearly, to say the least.  You only wanted me to help you and cuddle you and read to you and carry you – dad just wouldn’t do.  You wouldn’t eat anything that wasn’t exactly what you wanted.  You wanted what you wanted and you wanted it when you wanted it.  And it was hard.  Three was hard.

Luckily, the last couple months of three, things started to change.  You started to ask for daddy before me.  You became more flexible and less frustrating.  Thank you so much for that.  Really, Harriet, thank you for that.

Right now you are so much fun.  You are funny and creative.  You fiercely love the people in your life.  You have strong connections with people and are incredibly loyal.  You have changed from being stubborn to being strong (it’s an important difference to note).  I love to hear your opinions and your ideas.  You are so brave and are always willing to try new things, usually with a bit of gentle encouragement.  Last year you were scared to get your face wet, this year you’re swimming without your floaties and going down the big slide at the pool.  Last year you wouldn’t try your balance bike, this year you’re almost ready for pedals.

Four years ago, you were born on a Blue Moon.  Today, we will witness a full solar eclipse.   The planets have aligned.  I’ve always loved the moon, and since you were born four years ago, I’ve loved it even more with the connection between your birth and the moon.  Today we will stand in the moon’s shadow.  I think there is something to this, my girl.  You are my little moon girl and you were born to do great, big things.

Next year we will be getting ready for kindergarten.  But for today, and for this year, I want you to stay my little child, my baby.  No need to rush things, my Hattie Girl.  No need to stop sleeping in my arms.  No need to stop asking for my help.  Ne need to run too far or climb too high.

You are my girl and I love you to the moon and back a million times.

All my love,
Mommy

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Posted in: created., letters for my daughters, writing | Tagged: birthday letter, dear harriet, letter, letters, my daughters

Playgroup Camp-out

Posted by Carolyn on July 27, 2017 Leave a Comment

Earlier this month we rented a whole group campsite for our playgroup.  It’s the perfect place for so many small people.  It is a place to run, to get toes wet, to roast things over a fire, to sing songs, to play on pirate ship logs, to stay awake too long, and to make some fun memories.

Two other families ended up joining us for the camping, while two other families camp up for the day.

I have loved watching these kids grow up together.  This fall, a huge number of them are starting kindergarten and that’s sort of unbelievable and really exciting.

 

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Posted in: parented., photography, playgroup | Tagged: camping, playgroup

Harriet’s New Quilt

Posted by Carolyn on July 18, 2017 3 Comments

This has taken me so long.  I think I bought the fabric last summer when we moved Harriet into a big bed.  Then I started sewing in October.  Then I finished the quilt top in the winter.  Then I quilted it in the spring.  I finally got about to binding this past weekend and Harriet was so happy and excited.  I am too.

I used the same pattern as I did with Alma’s big quilt.  But, again I had to modify it.  I wanted to try the color gradation, but that was only designed for queen sized quilts.  I had to put on my thinking hat, do some math, and hope for the best.  It actually worked out just right and I really love the finished effect.

I used the same color scheme as I did with Alma’s quilt, but it is mostly different fabrics.  I love these scrappy quilts because it’s fun to use fabrics with sentimental value and find cute little quirky fabrics – I like the idea of the quilts being like eye-spy books with hidden things.  Harriet’s favorites are the pink mermaid tails scattered throughout the quilt.

Here’s a photo of the front of the quilt:

And the back.  I love making quilt backs more interesting than just a big expanse of fabric:

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Posted in: created., sewing, sewing for my daughters | Tagged: quilt, quilting, sewing

Summer To-Do List, 2017

Posted by Carolyn on June 20, 2017 2 Comments

Oh, hey, summer! How are you?  Again, I’m pretty happy to see you.  We have lots of good plans for you and I’m so excited to get started.

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Posted in: created., gratitude, to do lists | Tagged: bucket list, list, summer, to do, to do list

Dear Alma, On Your Fifth Birthday

Posted by Carolyn on January 3, 2017 Leave a Comment

Dear Alma,

Today you’re five.   Today is one of those thresholds.  You are entering a whole new stage of life.  Five is a big year.  Five is kindergarten, loose teeth, reading, school buses, bikes with pedals, new friends, long days away from home, writing.  Five is big.

Yesterday you were four and you were still a small little child.  Today you are five and you look like a whole new girl to me.  I have to be honest and say that my heart hurts a little bit when I look at you.  You are a well-spoken, creative, brave soul.  Not much of that little baby from five years ago remains.  Your legs are long and strong.  Your fingers are precise and careful.  Your eyes are clear and focused.  Your voice is loud and determined.  You are five.

You are growing up quickly and it makes me miss my baby.  But, Alma, I wouldn’t change it for anything.  Those baby days are gone, but I’m so happy about five.  I’m so excited to see all those things happen this year, but you will always be my baby.

My wishes for you this year:

  • You make new friends and keep the old
  • You are the kid in your class who welcomes everyone
  • You learn to read and enjoy it
  • You lose teeth with courage
  • You fall down and you get back up
  • You keep sitting in my lap and coming to me for comfort
  • You have compassion
  • You stand up for people who need it
  • You smile
  • You dance
  • You sing
  • You laugh
  • You know you are deeply and gracefully loved.

Alma, my little love, have fun being five.

All my love,
Mommy

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Posted in: gave thanks., letters for my daughters, writing | Tagged: birthday letter, dear alma

Christmas Tree and Santa Claus

Posted by Carolyn on December 1, 2016 Leave a Comment

The day after Thanksgiving is my favorite day because everyone catches up and starts getting ready for Christmas!  Overnight it becomes socially acceptable to listen to Christmas music, and it’s okay to deck the halls with Christmas cheer.  Finally.

This year we went to Northern Lights again.  We made the trek with Jesse’s folks this year.  We found a perfectly lovely Fraser Fir that was tall, and sparse, and green.

Jesse, with some help and encouragement from the girls and his dad, cut down our tree.  It has a much thicker trunk than our past trees, and Jesse had to work quite hard to fall it.

I love this rainy, muddy, sunny, chilly annual adventure.  I figure that since we live in the place where most the Christmas trees are grown, it’s worth it to go to the source and get the freshest of the fresh.

Because, just look at the sweet memories we are creating.

Back home we got the tree all decorated.  When we were done, there was a pretty solid ring of ornaments right at Harriet and Alma height.

And adding the star to the top is a family affair.  I love the magic of this moment, every single year.

We also got to visit Santa after church on Sunday.  I seriously love this Santa (except that this year, he told the kids he’s just a helper… I was fully committed to teaching our kids that he was the real deal, but, whatever…).

I think this was the first year both girls have happily gone right up to him and jumped into his lap.

We went, of course, with Rory and Poppy.  Poppy was a little unsure about the whole deal.

We wrote our letter to Santa and put it in the mailbox.  Then a talking tree – Doug Fir – came up and made us all a little uncomfortable.

But, hey!  It’s Christmas time!  It’s Advent!  Let’s be jolly!

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Posted in: decorating, holidays, story telling | Tagged: Advent, Christmas, christmas tree, holidays, Santa
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If God said, ‘Rumi pay homage to everything that has helped you enter my arms,’ there would not be one experience of my life, not one thought, not one feeling, nor any act, I would not bow to. -Rumi

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