gave thanks.

Spring and Summer To Do List – 2016

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Spring is almost halfway over, so I thought I should combine spring and summer into this next to do list.  This spring I’ve been feeling scattered and uninspired (you might have noticed).  I’ve recently started a full-time job, and that’s making me want to be more focused and organized.  It’s a choice that I’m making, and it’s feeling good to get back into it.

So, here are some things I want to get done this spring and summer.  A lot are repeats from last year because they were fun, or we didn’t get to them and I was to try again.

  1. Swim in the wild.
  2. Make ice cream.
  3. Go to the art museum.
  4. Go camping.
  5. Go to the beach.
  6. Bach Festival concerts/ events.
  7. Go to the mountains.
  8. Go to a track meet.
  9. Participate in a track meet.
  10. Fireworks.
  11. #93summerdays on Instagram starting on June 20th.  Play along!
  12. Go to a concert.
  13. Stargaze with Alma.
  14. Day date with Jesse.
  15. Day date with Alma.
  16. Day date with Harriet.
  17. Take the family to a movie.
  18. Lots of parks.
  19. Eat fresh produce from the garden/ farmer’s market.
  20. Tie dye something.
  21. Pick berries.
  22. Ice cream truck.
  23. Can some stuff.
  24. Eat the canned stuff from last summer.
  25. Ride bikes.
  26. Hike.
  27. Play outside everyday.

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I’m Choosing the Sun

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Alma has always been a late sleeper.  By that I mean she will sleep past seven most days, if we let her.  Harriet, on the other hand, has always been an early riser.  I think we’ve had two mornings in her life when she slept past seven.

I’ve decided to be more like Harriet.

My CHOOSE for now is to wake up before the sun.

I want to have some of those peaceful moments before everything, and everyone, starts going.  I want to have a moment where I can sit still before I have to go all day long.  I want to have moments with Harriet where we can explore together.  I want to take some time to notice these moments.

So, from now until the Solstice, I will be getting up earlier and earlier.  I have it all written out in my planner so I can set my alarm for ten minutes before the sunrise.

Yesterday, I was supposed to wake up at 5:52, but I was already awake at 5:50.  I went and sat in Harriet’s room and caught up on Instagram and stuff while she still slept.  I really noticed the sounds of Harriet’s breath as she slept.  I noticed the quiet all around us.  Then she stirred, turned over and saw me, and smiled.  I got her out of her crib and she said, “Thank you for staying with me, mommy.”

She was so happy that it made the whole morning shine.  She cuddled into me and her gratitude for my being there when she woke up was electric.

Today, I woke up with my alarm.  When I left my room, Harriet saw me, or heard me, and called out.  We got up, spent some time watching the sunrise in the backyard.  Alma joined us to make some hot cocoa, and our morning had begun.

It might be hard to wake up so early, but if all our mornings can be like this, I will have no reason to complain.

APRIL 2016: CURRENTLY

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working full time for the first time in a long time.

missing the kids.

knowing that this is just a long-term sub job that will be over this summer.

realizing that it’s good to miss the kids sometimes.

thinking it will be fun to have the whole summer with the kids.

listening to “Manhattan” when I want to write.

practicing “Baba Yetu,” all the time, whether I want to or not, because it’s always stuck in my head.

loving that I will get to sing “Baby Yetu” with the kids on mother’s day at church.

cracking up whenever Harriet requests “Baba Detu” because it’s awesome that she can say it, and sings along.

planning ways to be more productive and creative in May.

committing to some new goals.

using oils everyday.

wanting to use more oils everyday.

reading Twelfth Night at school, and Cinder at home.

 

MARCH 2016: CURRENTLY

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Listening to Hamilton over and over and over again.  Can I please teleport to New York for one night with some tickets in my hand?

Reading Harry Potter for the millionth time.

Using my new essential oils and loving them.

Enjoying all the flowers in all my views.

Working more these days, thanks to all the illness going around.

Fighting all the illnesses going around.

Comforting the girls as they fight illnesses and smash their fingers in doors.

Trying to be more calm, patient, and present.

Realizing that I only have a little time left of having the girls at home with me.

Pondering how I can avoid putting my kids into kindergarten classes with 29 other kids.

Wishing the schools were in a better situation.

Breathing.

 

CHOOSE March

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I CHOOSE to blog when I want to.

I CHOOSE to use essential oils.

I CHOOSE to celebrate Easter and Novruz.

I CHOOSE to sew.

I CHOOSE to give things away.

I CHOOSE to pick up my room everyday.

CHOOSE February – Results

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I CHOOSE to work as much as possible.  I did this.  I’ve been pretty busy with work and other commitments, but I’ve tried to focus on making work a priority.

I CHOOSE to sew things for other people and myself.  I made a couple dresses for the girls and worked on my quilt.

I CHOOSE to post a new blog each weekday.  I didn’t post everyday, but I chose when I wanted to post, and when I didn’t want to.  There were days when I didn’t feel it and I knew that a post would be half-hearted anyway, so I made the choice to skip a day or two.

I CHOOSE to clean my room everyday.  Still trying.  I don’t know why this is so hard for me.

I CHOOSE to keep trying to get 10,000 steps a day.  Since I chose to try, I succeeded.  Still not getting there everyday, but at least I’m trying.

I CHOOSE to keep eating a (mostly) Whole30 diet. Well, no.  And I feel it.  I need to recommit.

I CHOOSE to cook some Azerbaijani food.  We had some friends over for chorek and dushbara.

I CHOOSE to send a letter everyday. I have a couple days to catch up on, but I’ve almost done it.  And I loved it.  I will certainly be writing more letters in the future.

 

35 Things to do Before 35 – How Did I Do?

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Last year, on my birthday, I made a list of 35 things that I wanted to do before I turned 35.  Tomorrow I turn 35, and I wanted to look back at my 35th year and the things I accomplished.

  1. Read a book a month.  I didn’t really keep track, but I’m sure I read more than twelve books.
  2. Sign up for life insurance.  Didn’t do this, but we do get life insurance through Jesse’s job.  I’m not sure if we should pay for supplemental insurance.
  3. Try a Barre3 class.  I didn’t do this, but I took some yoga classes, and started going to the Rec Center on campus.
  4. Get a monthly massage.  Sadly, I didn’t even get one massage.
  5. Try acupuncture.  I still want to try this.
  6. Get a haircut.  I’ve gotten a couple, and even cut my own bangs recently.  Now I’m wanting a long, choppy bob to go with the new bangs.
  7. Try 5 recipes from my new cookbook!  I’ve made lots of things from this book.
  8. Spend a weekend at the beach.  I just missed this one – I’m going to the beach for the weekend next month.
  9. Spend a weekend in the mountains.  I did this a few times – camping and in Sunriver and Bend.
  10. Can something.  Peaces, barbeque sauce, sweet and sour sauce, spettighetti sauce, Uncle Chet’s dill pickles.
  11. Get our garden going again.  Still getting there…
  12. Focus on getting my Etsy shop going.  Note:  It has a new name and address – CaroMade!  Still getting there…
  13. Post one new listing on CaroMade every month.  Not quite…
  14. Do a creative retreat – either an organized one, or organize my own!  We almost have this scheduled.  It will probably have to wait until late spring or summer since we’re planning it in the mountains and none of the people going like to drive in the snow.
  15. Get more chickens.  We now have 9, and some are even laying again!
  16. Get back on my daily chore schedule!  Still in process…
  17. Go to Disneyland.  We took Alma last spring and it was magic.
  18. Go to a Broadway musical.  We saw Book of Mormon and it was incredible.
  19. Hike 35 miles.  Nope.
  20. Get the trailer set up and go on bike rides with the girls.  We did this a few times.
  21. Rent a limo.  Nope.
  22. Make and sew a huge cushion for our hearth.  I didn’t do this, but I did paint the fireplace white and I love it.
  23. Get chairs recovered.  They seriously need this, but we haven’t done it yet.
  24. Get estimates to get our house painted.  This summer.
  25. Set up some good seasonal capsule wardrobes.  I ended up Kon-Mari-ing everything and don’t really have enough for this.  I want to try it again, though.
  26. 5 Days of Christmas crafts on the blog.  So much fun.  I loved it.
  27. Get going on a creative, relaxing morning routine.  I’m not sure this is for me.  Maybe I’ll try again this summer when the sun rises earlier.
  28. More author interviews on the blog.  I want to get back to this.
  29. Plant a tree.  A pear tree.
  30. Take a class.  I’ve done things to renew my license, but I haven’t taken a creative class.
  31. Sew some clothing for me.  A couple Beatrix shirts.
  32. Make art for Alma’s and Harriet’s rooms.  Harriet’s name in felt.
  33. Go to the Country Fair.  So much fun.
  34. Go camping.  We went up the McKenzie and it was lovely.
  35. Build a sandcastle or a snowman.  Both.  Sand in Coronado, snow in Sunriver.

21/35 isn’t bad!  Here’s to next year… More on my plans for 36 coming tomorrow!

35 Gratitudes

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IMG_6295I’ve missed listing my gratitudes, after having done it almost weekly for an entire year in 2014.  I’m coming up on my 35th birthday, so I thought it would be fun to think of 35 things for which I’m grateful.

Yesterday, I went and had a crepe and a cup of coffee after getting a new crown and thought I would take that time to write down a list of 35 things.  I tried not to think too hard, just to write whatever came to mind.

Today, as I type it up, I will add some thoughts and reflections on the 35 things I thought of yesterday.

  1. Jesse. This one was easy and obvious.  I am so grateful for my husband and the 15 years I’ve had him in my life.  He is such an incredible partner.
  2. Alma. My sweet four-year-old who is becoming cooler and cooler every single day.  I am grateful for her affection, her stories, her laughter, her light.
  3. Harriet. My funny 2 1/2 year old who is seriously hilarious.  She knows it, too.  One of her favorite things to do is to do something funny, then say, “Me nunny!” which obviously means ‘I’m funny!’  Her personality is really coming out and it’s a wonderful mixture of hilarity, organization, adventure, and affection.
  4. Mom and Steve. These are two of the greatest parents and grandparents on this planet.  Mom is my best friend and I know I can always count on her.
  5. Dad and Deena.  Two more of the greatest.  Watching my dad with my kids is one of my favorite things to do.  He always had the best advice and has always been someone I can lean on.
  6. Dave and Maureen.  Two more fantastic grandparents.  Maureen always has fun ideas and projects to do with the girls.
  7. Alma’s relationship with my Grandma. I am so happy that Alma got to spend time with her great-grandma.  She’s been gone for almost 3 years, but Alma still talks about (and to) her.
  8. Cousins. My cousins, my kids’ cousins.  All cousins are fun.  It’s such a unique and precious relationship.
  9. Coffeeshops. I have such an affinity to coffeeshops and the hours they provide me to think and write.
  10. Preschool.  We are lucky to have such a fantastic preschool that values play and exploration.  As I look toward kindergarten, I get anxiety about the expectations, but I know that our girls are in a good place right now, with the right expectations and values.
  11. Subbing. I love my time with middle school students.  I love going to a class, seeing kids I know, learning with them, then leaving them.  I love not having papers to grade or standards to worry about.  Subbing is the best.
  12. Eugene. My hometown is the best.  We have museums, concerts, restaurants, nature, it all.  I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else.
  13. HearthStone. My guilty pleasure.  A super nerdy computer game and time suck.
  14. Church. Our church community is practically perfect.  And not at all, which makes it even more perfect.
  15. Sunshine in February. I have always loved having a week of sunshine right around my birthday.  It’s like a cheerful reminder of springtime.  But then it change back to:
  16. Rain.  During the summer, I start to get seasonal affective disorder, but it’s because all the sun is ugly and overwhelming.  I long for rainy days to wash all the summer dust off everything.  I like the February sunshine, but we better get some more rainy days before summer starts (not like last year!).
  17. Snow. We get far too little snow in the valley.  More trips to the mountains are needed.  I’m excited to get the girls on skis in the next couple years.
  18. Flowers.  I love how every flower seems like a beautiful surprise this time of year.  It’s not like we don’t know they’re coming – it’s just such a blessing when they pop up.
  19. Bikes.  Alma is all about her balance bike these days, and Harriet is all about the stroller, so we get to go on lots of walks.  The February sunshine helps.
  20. Language.  I love watching the kids pick up on the English language.  Alma loves trying out big words and I love it when she gets them wrong.  It’s so fascinating.  Harriet doesn’t have a whole lot of words, but she can sure make herself understood.
  21. Peace Corps.  In general, and specifically my experience.
  22. Azerbaijan.  My home on the other side of the world.  I think about it daily and wish we could go back.
  23. Jefferson Memorial.  The words on these walls are what our country is all about.
  24. Hamilton, the Musical.  If all American history could be taught through musical theater, I would be an expert.  Now if only I could find a way to get to New York, and my hands on a ticket…
  25. Friends.  Not the show, the people.  We just had a weekend with some of the best.  We are surrounded by some of the best people in the world.  I love my friends.
  26. Our House.  It’s perfect for us.
  27. Fresh eggs & produce.  Growing my own food is so great.  Cooking eggs from our chickens can’t be beat.
  28. Instagram.  Sure, it’s a time suck, but it is so inspiring.  It is like a huge creative community.
  29. Writing.  Taking the time to write has been so special to me.  I have ideas and dreams of writing books, but for now, getting my ideas down on this platform is wonderful.
  30. Reading. I am in the best, most enlightened, book club on the planet.
  31. Gel Pens. Love ’em.
  32. Music. Couldn’t live without it.
  33. Patience.  Mine, and from others.
  34. Hobbies.  My hobby is sewing.  Jesse’s is brewing.  I love that both of our hobbies create things out of nothing.
  35. Obama.  I’ve seen the stats.  He’s been a successful, inspiring president.

Productivity

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One of the things I’m choosing this year is to be more productive.  It’s hard to get into a routine since my days are all so different, so it’s been really hard to figure out the best way to be productive.

I have three things this year that are really helping me get stuff done. I have realized that I am all about extrinsic motivation.  If I’m going to do something, I need to get something out of it.

The first thing I’m using is something I also used last year – Elise Blaha’s goal trackers.  I use these to make my goals public and visible.  I get to color in a little circle every time I accomplish something.  It’s ridiculously satisfying to color in the circles, and to step back and see all the colored-in circles.

The next thing I’m using is my Get to Work Book, also from Elise Blaha.  If you need some motivation, go check her out.  She has incredible ideas and is a fantastic writer.  It has taken me a while to figure out how to best use this book for me.  I’m still figuring it out, actually.

Right now I’m using it to make daily to do lists in the daily sections.  One thing I love about the planner is all the extra space for project ideas, little notes, and reflection.

I like using it for lists, but I’ve also seen some amazing ideas on the Instagram account.  Once again, drawing a star on each of my to do items is ridiculously satisfying.

This last one is a new one.  It’s an app called Forest.  I set a timer in the app and if I don’t leave the app before the time is over, I get to grow a tree.  Then all the trees are put into a forest.  This app combines so many of my favorite things – trees, video games, extrinsic motivation, and pretty illustrations.  I use it when I’m trying to get work done.

I also use it when I want to spend time playing with the kids without distraction.  This has been the best part of it, honestly.  When I have Forest set up, I don’t randomly check Instagram and Facebook.   In the end I get a tree, and, even better, I know I have spent my time well.

Dear Daddy,

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Dear Daddy,

Yesterday was your birthday and I’ve been wanting to tell you something.  I write to the girls on their birthdays, but I think it’s important to write to you, too.

I have always admired you, daddy.  You always worked hard to give all of us a wonderful life.  You worked hard, but you were always home for dinner and present in our lives.  On Sunday mornings, I would wait to see you get up, then I’d follow you to the living room so you could read the comics to me.  You were always up to play in the backyard, or play a game of Pente.  You came to my recitals even when it meant missing a track meet.  You taught me how to ride my bike on two wheels.

One of my favorite memories of us is from a bike ride.  I can remember exactly where this conversation took place, right around the corner from where I live today.  We were riding ‘around the block’ and you told me that you hope I will always call you Daddy.  I remember thinking that was absurd that you would even ask.  Of course you’ll always be my daddy.

You have another name now.  You are also Papa, and I am so glad that my girls get to have a Papa like you.  They light up when they see you, and honestly, you light up, too.  You are such a great grandfather.  You get down to their level to play with them.  You spoil them just the right amount.  I know that I can count on you to take wonderful care of them.

Happy birthday, Daddy.  I hope you know how important you are to me, and how much I love you as my Daddy, and as Alma and Harriet’s Papa.

Love,
Carolyn